"Rude nurse"

My parent-in-law was transferred to Medical ward late from ED. They were end-stage dementia with renal failure and we were hoping to get them to Palliative. They ended up passing away early in the morning three days later at another hospital.  

I felt this nurse was extremely rude in the handling of my family at the time of my relative being wheeled into Medical ward. They were carrying on about COVID and telling us my parent needed to settle in (they were totally non-communicative and barely conscious so not sure how they needed to settle in). In my opinion, the nurse was very abrupt in their manner with no compassion or empathy towards our family who were all waiting for my parent to die.

Members of our family had come down from Perth too, so emotions were very raw as we had all spent the day with my parent in ED (they were in ED for 16 hrs waiting for a bed prior to going to Medical ward). As a family, we understood the COVID restrictions during this time and were respectful of the hospital’s requirements. At another time, some family members were talking outside the ward where the lifts are about what the doctors might do with my relative. The nurse approached us again in, I feel, an abrupt manner and we explained we were just waiting to hear from a doctor as to what will be happening with my parent. The nurse had also previously pulled their phone out too while staring at us standing where we were, which I believe was to make us feel uncomfortable.

As we had decided to stop further treatment and were waiting to see a Palliative doctor, you could imagine the sadness and start of grief the family was experiencing.

To add to our grief, this nurse decided to call security as we were waiting down the passage very close to the main entrance while only 2 people were allowed in my parent’s room at this same nurse’s request. In my opinion, the nurse was speaking on her phone in a harsh tone pointing at us saying that they had told this family so many times and ... (I feel implying they were so over it)

In my opinion, this nurse’s cynical attitude with no care whatsoever for what we were going through was disgusting. Certainly not the caring nature I feel you would expect for a nurse. This nurse added to our family’s grief and their lack of care and compassion during a family members death was disgusting and deeply upsetting. My spouse was so distressed that night from this abhorrent behaviour that they could not sleep.

I have worked personally within the medical industry for many years and felt quite sickened that someone like that is working in such a role. At no time did the nurse ever question our circumstances. It seemed like it was all about power and control.