"Traumatic labour"

I’m a few months post-partum and still dealing with the trauma of my birth at King Edward Memorial Hospital (KEMH). 

My first birth at King Eddies went great so I was looking forward to having my second. I have Vasovagal Syncope and was having lots of problems with fainting so I was seeing a psychologist through the hospital. To help with my fainting it was really important to have adequate pain management and lots of support. This was very clear in my birth plan and I would tell anyone that would listen. 

I made it to just over 30 weeks and then out of the blue my water broke. We rushed to the hospital and I was admitted to the maternity ward. They gave me steroids to help develop baby's lungs, antibiotics to stop infection and put me on bed rest until I went into labour. I believe they were hoping baby would stay put for a couple of weeks but two days later I woke up late at night with an intense contraction. 

Over the next couple of hours the pain became unbearable. I wanted my spouse to come in but my midwife told me to let them get some rest and not to call them yet. I begged for an epidural but they weren’t able to give it to me until they were sure I was in active labour. I asked to be transferred to a delivery suite but was told I had to wait. They agreed to give me morphine but when they were injecting it the medicine kept leaking out the side. I'm not sure how much I ended up getting but I felt it didn’t help at all.

Finally, after midnight a doctor came and checked me. They said my cervix was still closed and I wasn’t in labour yet. I was in so much pain, it didn’t make sense. Over the next hour the pain intensified. I was running around the room non-stop trying to outrun the pain. There was no break in between contractions. I believe my midwife was busy with other patients and I felt like a massive inconvenience to them. I told them I needed to push and all they said was don’t push, and left the room. I thought about leaving the maternity ward and going to the emergency room downstairs, maybe they would believe that I was in labour? There’s no way I could make it there though. I felt so alone and helpless as no one was there for me. Alone in the bathroom, I reached down and felt my baby’s head coming out. I pressed the emergency button and everyone came rushing in. They got me in the bed and as soon as they saw the head they started wheeling me to the delivery room. My midwife looked at me and said sternly (in my opinion), don’t scream and don’t push.

I was in shock. I didn’t make a sound. I just wanted the pain to stop and for my baby to be ok. I pushed my baby out in 10 minutes. They were born just 92 minutes from when I was last checked and told I was definitely not in labour. 

A few minutes later my spouse arrived. They were so shocked to see our baby already born. No one had told my spouse I was in labour but they were worried when I didn’t answer my phone, so they called the hospital and they told them to come in. Our child was transferred to the NICU where they stayed for just over two weeks. 

I don’t feel like I got adequate support during my labour. I felt I was in the most excruciating pain of my life and I felt like no one believed me. I didn’t get to have anyone with me supporting me or telling me it was going to be ok.