"Induction of labour"

My first child’s birth.

I had a negative birthing experience with a foley balloon. After the birth I felt so out of it and it took me a really long time to feel bonded to my baby. The night after my baby was born I stayed in hospital without my partner and while the staff did their best I struggled being a first time mum so exhausted and feeling so out of it. This also affected my postpartum period. I hope when they redo the hospital they accommodate partners in the room throughout birth and postpartum because no first time mum should feel like I felt after.

My second child’s birth

I went into hospital, my midwife (Kim who I believe doesn’t usually work at KEMH) was so lovely and when she did the VE she folded my underwear for me, that small gesture made me feel really cared for. Later, the midwives (Kim and Chelsea) put the foley balloon, at the time I had the foley balloon put in I explained my previous experience with the foley balloon and asked if I feel it had fallen out but not completely could they check me before the traditional 12 hour period and they said they would but explained the reason they don’t like to do too many checks is because it increases the risk of infection. Shortly after the foley balloon was inserted I started to have contractions. They were getting very regular and around that afternoon they stopped. I knew then that the foley balloon had stopped working but thought I’d give it 30 minutes to an hour to make sure.

After 30 minutes, a new midwife came in and I explained my last experience and they kept saying yep yep yep but I felt that they weren’t actually listening to what I was saying. I then asked if they would check me and they refused, they said they wouldn’t check me before 12 hours and I should spend the next 8 hours resting. I knew that I would have to wait hours after the foley balloon comes out for a midwife to become available so I didn’t want to waste an extra 8 hours for no reason. I went to the bathroom and gently pulled on the end until it came out. I said to my partner that I hope we won’t have that midwife for one on one care as I felt they clearly weren’t going to advocate for me and I didn’t feel respected.

Around 5 hours later, a new lovely midwife Kim (who usually works at KEMH) breaks my waters. She went through my birth plan point by point asking me questions and seeing what were the most important aspects to me. She was so helpful throughout my labour, he was born just over 2 hours after my water was broken. We had delayed cord clamping and he was put straight up onto me for skin to skin. The midwife left him on me for an hour and a half and he had his first feed before he even left my chest. I had a 1st degree tear and a small graze but compared to my first birth I felt amazing afterwards and like myself. I felt like my midwife really respected my wishes and accommodated them in whichever way she could, I felt very cared for.

The postpartum period was a night and day difference to my first birth and I put that down to not having to stay an extra night in hospital without my husband and choosing not to have the gas and air this time. I bonded with my baby straight away and my recovery was much easier.

I had a lot of positive experiences and the only negative experience was the midwife who I felt didn’t listen to me and didn’t want to help move the process along. I would have understood if it was my first experience with a foley ballon but I knew how my body responds to it and I felt that wasn’t taken into consideration. I shouldn’t have had to do that myself even if protocol is to wait 12 hours I can’t imagine if someone said this is the experience I’ve had before I know it will take less than 12 hours why should you have to wait for an additional 8 hours for the sake of protocol. In my opinion, they could have just given it a tug without doing an exam but I felt like they refused to have anything to do with me and basically only came in the room to do their job and left straight after without being personable.

For me it comes down to after that experience with them if something bad had happened while I was in their care I wouldn’t have felt confident that they would do the right thing for me or listened to me in comparison to the 2 Kims who, if something bad had happened, I would have trusted them completely.