"Dismissive midwife"

I was referred to King Edward Memorial Hospital (KEMH) Emergency Department (ED) by my GP late one afternoon recently after confirmation of an anembryonic pregnancy on ultrasound that day. The sonographer, radiologist and my GP all shared concerns about the risk of heavy bleeding due to gestation and thickness of the uterine lining. My GP felt that dilation and curettage (D&C) in the coming days was the best course of management to avoid the risk of such a bleed. 

After sitting for hours in the waiting room, I was told that guidelines meant that the hospital would not be able to assist at that time. This news, combined with the fact that a much-wanted pregnancy was non-viable, was upsetting, however, I do appreciate that protocol exists and this is no fault of the hospital or the very kind Consultant that I saw. 

What I found most distressing was the behaviour from the triage midwife who I felt gave cold and robot-like advice and the snarky declaration that I was not going to bleed to death as I left.

Their actions ensured that, in an effort to avoid being humiliated and belittled again, I wouldn’t be wasting my time or theirs by seeking any further assistance on the matter there. I am doing my best to reserve judgement on why this midwife conducted themselves in what I felt was such a dismissive, callous and dangerous way that day.

I just thought they might like to know that technically, they were right- it was just hypovolemic shock and emergency surgery instead of bleeding to death from the catastrophic haemorrhage as a result of the miscarriage that ended up occurring. Thank you to another hospital's ED, OBGYN and surgical crews who were able to assist after others, in my opinion, saw no need. 

I know compassion fatigue is real but this was one hell of a miss. May you learn from this and understand that I believe your words almost cost someone their life. Please don’t repeat this mistake with another woman.