"Problems with one clinician"

We had a midwife that had delivered a baby for us, which I felt the delivery they were great at and did really well and were impressed at that part. But that was the only thing good about the whole thing. 

I felt this midwife always had to make sexist comments towards men and then just laugh it off like it was no issue, or I felt, say mean things towards you and just laugh it off like it was ok.

One example, right after the birth when we had to get my partner out of the delivery room they asked me to bring along the drip trolley behind them to move my partner which was ok, but there was cables and hoses going everywhere and all tangled up. So I had to disconnect them from the wall and untangle them. Not even 5 seconds after I started the midwife turned around and said, I recall, bloody hell, men they can't do anything. I responded with, well it's all tangled up and needs to be disconnected, and I felt they quickly responded with, you men are just all useless. Mind you at this point me and my partner had been up for 2 days with no sleep due to the labour, so we were really not in the mood to do much or deal with people like this midwife. There were a lot of other things said too but the list will just go on and on.

My partner had gone to sleep and 3 hours later they were woken up by the same midwife due to the baby crying. At this time my partner had a catheter in, still had 2 drips in and was also recovering from the epidural as they couldn't walk, as one leg still had no feeling in it. I felt the midwife had told my partner off about how they didn't get up to change their baby's nappy. My partner was told they should have woken up when the baby cried (which yes fair enough, as a mother should wake up to look after their child). Also that was the first 3 hours of sleep my partner had gotten in 2 days so I believe the baby should have been taken care of by the midwife with no complaints. As, I feel, the mother really needs their rest so they do have the strength to look after the baby.

I believe the midwife went on about this to my partner for 10 mins and then changed the baby's nappy for my partner while still going on about it to them. My partner didn't say anything to the midwife as they were really just too tired to. 

I believe our friends had gone in 3 months earlier before us and had seemingly the exact same experience as us. In which, I understand they had the same things happen to them by the same midwife, being, I believe, sexist towards them, being mean/rude. One experience I believe they had with the midwife was that they apparently said they were not allowed to have the baby's last name the same as the fathers. I understand the midwife was saying this as our friends are recently married but the mother just has filed the papers yet to change her last name to her partners which is the father. To which I understand they argued about with this midwife of course, because they both wanted it to be the fathers last name.

So I feel it is very annoying to hear apparently it is not just us that was receiving this kind of treatment from this midwife. Our friends did tell us, I recall, that if we got this midwife to just straight up ask for another midwife as they weren't worth it and now I see why after dealing with them.

I felt all day shift staff were really good and helpful towards both of us and we have no complaints towards them, just the one midwife. This was our first experience there, as it was our first baby, but next time we would really not like to have to put up with a midwife like that again. We know we can ask for another but we didn't as there was, I believe, none available. Which was ok, but we didn't have to put up with what we needed to, which next time we hope we don't have to.