"Guided birth"

The Positive Birth Program gave me and my husband (who was my birth partner) a lot of tools to navigate baby’s birth in the best, calmest, safest and most informed way possible.

My membrane broke spontaneously and I decided to get an induction since surges were not starting on their own. I felt empowered at all times to choose what I preferred and the medical team respected and accompanied every step, there were no issues or struggles at all. We had a birth plan (based on the sample one from the program) and the midwives went through it in detail and followed it. We didn't plan ahead for an induction, but at the moment we both felt good about it and adapted our plan and expectations to it. Our mindset was always to stay happy and at peace, and to do whatever felt right for the safety of bub and me.

I decided I wanted to know how dilated my cervix was and at the starting point, it was only 1 cm. After everything, I understood why the program suggests to not be informed of the dilation progression :)

I kept moving through surges, walking, dancing slowly and bouncing on a birthing ball. At some point just moving wasn't enough so my midwife offered me to jump in the shower and use the water to relieve contractions (water was one of my desired ways of going through labour).

The breathing techniques through surges were fundamental and my husband's hands working on the acupressure points made it easier as well. After midday, my midwife checked my dilation again because I wanted to know. She informed me that I was 2 cm dilated.

I felt I needed extra help. I was feeling defeated like I couldn't do it anymore. Once everything was over I knew why I was feeling like that; my baby was about to be born.

Both my husband and my midwife were super supportive and kept encouraging me and providing positive words, reminding me to focus on my breathing and to accept the wave of the surge instead of fighting it.

I felt I needed to lay down finally, after 3+ hrs of strong contractions with really short pauses between them. I laid in bed on my side with a birthing ball between my legs. I asked for some pain killer because I really felt defeated and I was offered the gas (it was the first option in my birth plan after the natural ones I already used). As soon as I breathed it in for the first time, my mind relaxed enough to move to the back and let my body do the job, a job my baby knew how to do. I just needed to step back and trust.

Once my body took control of the situation, it started pushing by itself. All of this was happening after half an hour of my midwife telling me I was 2 cm dilated! Eyes closed from this point on, between pushes and involuntary guttural sounds coming through my throat from the depths of my womb, I felt I was in some sort of trance. I was there, but I also wasn't. I could hear my midwife guiding me and my husband supporting me, but their words were not clear. My body knew what to do, so the only information that was getting through was the important one. I remember hearing my midwife asking me to find a different position to birth my baby, whatever I felt like. I naturally just turned around on the bed and took a knees and hands position, on all fours. I asked (always with my eyes closed, really focused) is my baby coming? And they all said yes, he is coming! And I cried for a second. I asked them to take photos (I'm into photography haha) and my husband told me they were already doing it, and I went back to focusing on pushing.

At one point I also heard my midwife telling me to put one hand to feel my baby's head, and I did. She guided me through pushes and having my hand there also helped me to understand better how I was pushing.

Finally she asked me to stop breathing the gas (that I was intermittently breathing) because I was really close to meeting my baby, to remove my hand and to hold a push.

My baby was born, received by the hands of my husband and my midwife. I was back on that room in full presence.

I turned around to meet him and in tears I grabbed him and held him. I felt I could go through labour like that a million times more, pain wasn't a thing anymore.

I knew I wanted to try baby led attachment to the breast as we learnt on the program and the breastfeeding class, so I did and he found the nipple straight away and started sucking.

My baby and I were skin to skin for 2 wonderful hours. After that it was time to weigh him and all of that, so my husband was invited to hold him through it. He took his shirt off and kept him skin to skin before and after all his measurements, with the biggest and proudest smile ever, while I cried looking at the two loves of my life hugging for the first time.