"ICU staff member"

It took 3 calls over 9 days for a return call. 2 made by myself and 1 made by my sibling.

We were enquiring after the status of a patient, our relative and understand next of kin only are allowed information. Sadly our relative’s parent is estranged from their family and has taken it upon themselves to include our relative in this.

The nurses were lovely in trying to reiterate the rules when we phoned. We were told our relative may not make it and was fighting for their life. This was from the newspaper.

I asked if there was any kind of social support available or someone we could talk to as we were terribly distraught. I had helped raise this person.

The nurse on duty took details and said someone would call us back. I waited and no response. My sibling did the same and no response.

As it’s ICU I can appreciate the pressures all staff are under, saving lives. So I phoned again the same week wanting to know if my relative was alive! Or will I have to read about it in the newspaper. They were apologetic and said they’d get someone to ph me. No one did.

One week later I called again asking if my relative is still alive …………. No answer. Same story you aren’t allowed to know or visit. During this time I believe a friend from my relative’s school days was allowed to visit and sit with them, totally contradicting what we had been told as biological family.

At the same time I mentioned no social worker had phoned us back.

That afternoon a senior social worker phoned me back. I felt they had the empathy of an ice cube, was very direct at giving their ‘spiel’ and seemingly didn’t listen. I felt they did not offer any help, suggestions or show understanding.

I asked them their name again and status and who they were employed by.

I felt they barked their details at me highlighting ‘senior’ I thanked them and hung up. Later in the afternoon I received a call from a government dept, saying I was listed for a court proceeding.

I had no idea what it was about, who had given my details out etc, I was not prepared for the phone call.

My disgruntle lies with this Senior Social Worker, their apparent attitude dealing with heartbroken families, their seemingly lack of empathy, their ability to listen, and, I believe, inability to manage their time. In my opinion, 9 days for a phone call back is not excusable.

I have to question why they work in this field and perhaps I feel they need to revisit their learnings.

Thankfully for me I have family support for this terrible situation, I did not receive anything from them, and I worry for people not as fortunate as me to have outside support as to how they navigate similar waters, and where they would go for help.